Dr Dosti Regmi Blog

पुरै गिजामा एउटा मात्रै दाँत  तैपनि बुढी आमाको मुस्कान कति मिठो ।।

मेरो जिन्दगी, मेरो भोगाई ; मेरो प्राप्ति, मेरो अप्राप्ति ; मेरो हार, मेरो जित; मेरो सम्बन्धी, मेरो बैरी; मेरो मान, मेरो अपमान; मेरो दौडधुप, मेरो सुबिस्ता; खोइ जति नै मेरो मेरो भने तापनि  सबै सबै कुरामा आफैंलाई गयल पाउँछु । #Absentself #Sleepwalking through life. (Painting: Sleepwalker by Pirner)

Less parenting is better parenting. Instruct less. They will listen when we instruct less. Don't be harsh when they make mistakes. They will be scared to make mistakes. Mistakes are opportunities to grow. Confident kids are not those who do not make mistakes. Confident kids are those who are not scared to make mistakes. When your child is loud, angry, and disrespectful, Do you get louder, angrier, and even more disrespectful? Don't compete with them. Regulate your emotions and show them better behaviors. Be calm and firm in your reply. Breathe and regulate your emotions. Children learn from us. To raise emotionally intelligent children be a model. Name your feeling and describe how you feel and how you deal with it and tell them that it will get better in some time. Children stop listening to you either because they don't feel good about the way you respond or because you instruct too much. Never tell them that everything will be okay but tell them that we all feel bad at ...

We say "I want happiness." If we let go of ego (I) and desire (want), Happiness is all that remains. The path is to slow down and diffuse the fog of thoughts. Living life at a fast pace is like listening to a beautiful song at 2x speed. You will miss the music and the melodious vocals will be distorted. The fog of thought can pass me, but cannot bury me. The thoughts are a separation between me and existence and life. Life and existence is always flowing. There is no static truth to be searched, but life to be experienced. Even a bad dish is far better than a nice cookbook. Let go of all the cookbooks you carry in your brain. I was meditating on the windchimes. There, I started to compare it with the sound of the bells in the mule´s neck during my trek to Annapurna. The sun was similar, I compared. Maybe the mental vacation made me feel good. But when I let go of all attribution, meaning, and thought process the sound actually flowed through me.  Be happy and be kind. Hug you...

  I can see the Zen wisdom of our inherent Buddha nature (Tathagata garbha) and the importance of transcending mind and ego (Yogachitta) to attain reality resonating in the contemporary Advait Vedanta teachers' quotes. Rupert Spira: “You are the open, empty, allowing presence of Awareness in which everything that appears is known.” “The separate self is simply the activity of resisting what is and seeking what isn’t.” “Peace is our nature. It is not something we need to find or create; it is simply what we are.” “Happiness is the nature of our being, and we share our being with everyone and everything.” “Your being is like the screen on which a movie is playing—it remains untouched by whatever appears upon it.” Jean Klein: “You are already free; you are just dreaming that you are not.” “The person you take yourself to be is only a habit of thought, a repetitive pattern. Let it be, and see what remains.” “Reality is not an object of the mind, it is perceived when the mind is ...

Expression in every intense moment of human existence, be it a word, a broken word, or a silence, needs at least a thousand philosophical footnotes for explanation.  ~Dosti Regmi "Things are simply the way they are. They don't give us suffering. Like a thorn: Does a sharp thorn give us suffering? No. It's simply a thorn. It doesn't cause suffering to anybody. If we step on it, we suffer immediately. Why do we suffer? Because we stepped on it. So the suffering comes from us."  ~ Ajahn Chah

Everything you touch surely dies.  You never know whether before you or after you die. So why this passion, clinging and attachment? Why this regret for not having a hold on the things we had? Why this anxiety for what tomorrow holds for you. Life is just a welcome and goodbye.  Instance by instance. Moment by moment. मान्छेले पक्डिन पनि जन्नुपर्छ। छोड्न पनि जन्नु पर्छ।।

बच्चाहरू अक्सर घर बाहिर गइरहन्छन् । कहिले प्रितिकर कुरा भेट्छन्, फुरुङ्ग भएर फर्किन्छन्। कहिले अप्रितिकर कुरा भेट्छन्, दुखी भएर फर्किन्छन् । घर फर्केपछि दुवैजना दुवै थोक भुल्छन्, खुसी हुन्छन्, बराबरै खुशी हुन्छन्, बच्चाहरू अक्सर घर बाहिर गइरहन्छन्  अज्ञानी भएर फर्किन्छन्। बच्चाहरू घर फर्किन्छन्,  ज्ञानी हुन्छन्।।

समय , परिस्थिति; मान्छे, माहोल; सबै कता गए कता। अनुभुति मात्रै आफ्नो हुँदो रहेछ। आज सम्म पनि मै सङ छ। नमर्दा सम्म छोड्दिन भन्छ।। आकाशलाई के छ र? रुन मन लागे रुन्छ। हाँस्न मन लागे हाँस्छ। आखिर भिज्ने र पोल्ने मलाई न हो।।

  जिन्दगी, कुन अवगुण लुकाउन यति सुन्दरी भएर आयौ? कुन धारिलो छुरा लुकाएकी छौ यति मुस्कुराउँदै आयौ?

It's not about running away from the crisis and suffering. It's running towards mystery. There are two kinds of ignorance. The one that knows is ignorant and is curious and corrects itself and learns. The other type does not know about its ignorance and never improves itself. There is drama in the world and also drama in the temple. People are either running away from something or running towards something. We are responsible for our karma. Rituals is the foolishness of trying to delegate it and outsource it. There is a man in Kumbha printing pictures of people and dipping them in gangs to suggest  snan.  Cf A Brahmin who killed a cow and said it was the hand of Indra. The basic human problem is fear of survival and loneliness since the caveman. He also wanted security and wanted to have companions and few people around him(tribe). But having food for today was fine. Tomorrow will take care of itself. Today also the basic problem is the same. But all the technologies have comp...

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)  is one of the most widely used evidence-based psychotherapies for treating various mental health conditions, including anxiety, depression, PTSD, and OCD. CBT operates on the principle that  thoughts, emotions, and behaviors are interconnected , and by changing maladaptive thought patterns, individuals can influence their emotions and behaviors positively. A core technique of CBT is  cognitive restructuring , which involves identifying and challenging irrational or unhelpful thoughts and replacing them with more balanced perspectives.   Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) , though related to CBT, takes a different approach by  focusing on acceptance rather than changing thoughts . Developed within the framework of mindfulness-based interventions, ACT teaches individuals to detach from unhelpful thoughts and emotions rather than struggling to eliminate them. Through six core processes: 1. Acceptance – Allowing emotions...

The technique of submerging your face in cold water to relieve anxiety and depression is rooted in the mammalian dive reflex and vagal nerve stimulation . It is a simple yet powerful physiological hack that can rapidly calm the nervous system.  When you submerge your face in cold water, your body triggers the dive reflex , which slows your heart rate, conserves oxygen, and induces a state of calm. This is an automatic response seen in marine mammals like seals and dolphins and is also present in humans. The vagus nerve is a key part of the parasympathetic nervous system (rest-and-digest mode). Cold exposure on the face, especially around the eyes, nose, and forehead , stimulates the vagus nerve, leading to decreased stress and increased emotional regulation. Anxiety and depression often involve overactivation of the sympathetic nervous system (fight-or-flight response). Cold water immersion shifts the body into a parasympathetic (calm) state , reducing cortisol (stress hormon...

यो बाटोमा, कहिले व्यस्ततामा हिँडे  कहिले भौतारिएर हिँडे  कहिले उल्लासमा हिँडे  कहिले सन्नाटा बोकेर हिँडे  तर अब तिमीले मलाई यो बाटोमा हिँडेको कहिले देख्ने छैन।  म अब बाटो छेउमै बोधिवृक्ष बनेर बसें। Painting: Joy and sorrow by Shery Lauren

If you watch a lot of serials, or movies for a long time, you can derive a recurring theme in all of those stuff. Just like Love and romance, Family values and sacrifice, Revenge and justice, Corruption and social issues, good guys, bad guys, poor heroes, princess heroines, and star-crossed love in Bollywood. The hero's journey, Good vs Evil, Power of love, Redemption, Survival and Resilience, Time travel and alternative reality, Apocalypse and underdog stories are recurring themes in Hollywood. Despite the recurring themes, the movies of the same epoch are brimming with the same theme but the audience is not satisfied, they want the same thing over and over again. Similar threads can be seen in the motivational and self-help books. Here are some of the most frequently repeated themes: 1. Your Mindset Shapes Your Reality – What you believe, you become. Your thoughts dictate your actions and, ultimately, your outcomes. (Think and Grow Rich, The Power of Positive Thinking) 2. Take ...

The legend of Bagger Vance: Old Hardy: God is happiest when his children are at play. Confused, broken... and unable to face a return to a hero's welcome... Junuh just disappeared... Hoping to forget... and to be forgotten... Junnah: Now, the question on the table is how drunk is drunk enough? And the answer is that it's all a matter of brain cells Hardy: Brain cells? Junnah: That's right Hardy. You see every drink of liquor you take kills a thousand brain cells. Now that doesn't much matter 'cos we got billions more. And first the sadness cells die so you smile real big. And then the quiet cells go so you just say everything real loud for no reason at all. That'ok, that's ok because the stupid cells go next, so everything you say is real smart. And finally, come the memory cells. These are tough sons of bitches to kill. You're daddy stared adversity in the eye, Hardy. And he beat it back with a broom. "Inside each and every one of us is our one, tr...

आज म मृत्युको कथा लेख्दैछु।  आफैलाई शिरदेखि पाउसम्म हेर्छु। आफ्नै कपाल सुमसुम्याउँछु। गाला मुसार्छु। ओठलाई स्पर्श गर्छु। सिरानीको आभास लिन्छु। डसनाको स्पर्शलाई ठम्याउँछु। चादरको मुलायमतालाई अनुभव गर्छु। मांसपेशीहरूलाई तन्क्याउँछु र त्यसको आभास लिन्छु। आन्द्रा, मृगौला, कलेजो,फोक्सो, मुटु, स्वास नली, आँखा, नाक, चर्म सबै सबै आआफ्नो काम गरिरहेका छन्। हावाको सरसराहट सुनेकै छु। कोइलीको को हो को हो सुनेकै छु। कोठाको चिसो तातो अनुभव गरेकै छु।  म र वर्तमान को बीचमा कुनै दरार छैन। मेरो अस्तित्व र प्रकृति को बीच कुनै दुरी छैन। न त मलाई कसैले समयभन्दा अगाडि तानेको छ न त समयभन्दा पछाडि तानेको छ। म समय सँगसँगै मेरो वर्तमान, मेरो अस्तित्व, मेरो ब्रह्माण्ड सबै एकाकार भएका छन्, छुट्याउन सक्दिन कुन को हो र कुन को हो। आफूले आफैंलाई चिनेपछि हामीलाई कुनै पनि परिस्थिति, मनस्थिति, व्यक्ति, घटना-परिघटना कसैकसैले पनि बिरानो जस्तो व्यवहार गर्न दिँदो रहेनछ। लोभियो भने त्यो त म होइन अर्कै भैयो कि? रिसायो भने त त्यो म होइन अर्कै भैयो कि? जस्तो लाग्छ। मृत्युको संघारमा पुगेको म पुरानो एक्लो घरमा आएर बसेको छ...

Finding purpose and meaning in life is a deeply personal journey that looks different for everyone. While there’s no single formula, here are some steps and reflections that can help guide you: 1. Reflect on Your Passions and Values Ask Yourself: • What activities make me lose track of time? • What do I care about most deeply? • What would I do even if I wasn’t getting paid for it?              • Your passions and values often align with what brings meaning to your life. 2. Explore Your Strengths • Think about what you’re naturally good at or what others often come to you for help with. Your talents can be a clue to where you might find fulfillment. • Tools like personality tests (e.g., Myers-Briggs (mine is INFP), StrengthsFinder) or feedback from friends can help you identify strengths. 3. Help Others or Contribute to a Cause • Serving others can give life purpose. Volunteering, mentoring, or simply being a source of su...

Nihilism: “ God is dead. God remains dead. And we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves, the murderers of all murderers? What was holiest and mightiest of all that the world has yet owned has bled to death under our knives: who will wipe this blood off us? What water is there for us to clean ourselves? What festivals of atonement, what sacred games shall we have to invent? Is not the greatness of this deed too great for us? Must we ourselves not become gods simply to appear worthy of it?” ―  Friedrich Nietzsche, The Madman and the Gay Science The decline of religion eventually threw people's minds into chaos leaving us wondering why we are even here why should we care what anyone thinks. This line of thought creates a void that can lead to depression and anxiety and that void is exactly what nihilism represents.   With the advent of Darwin and Copernicus, the universe ceased to be anthropocentric or geocentric. Existensialism's response to nihilism: Existential...